Nourishing Eden

8 Signs Your Teen Needs to See a Therapist

8 Signs Your Teen Needs To See A Therapist

 

If you aren’t actively looking for the signs of declining mental health in your teen, you might be missing them.  Here are 8 signs your teen needs to see a therapist.

 

1.  A Change in Mood

 

Some fluctuation in a teen’s mood is normal given the hormonal cocktail that is going on in their brain. 

However, if your teen appears to be unable to control their emotions, seems depressed or down most of the time or can’t seem to shake a bad mood, it may mean therapy is warranted. 

In addition to mood swings, your teen may start to experience feelings of anxiety or nervousness during this time. 

The adolescent’s experience often centers around the ideas of “Am I good enough?” and “Will they like me?”

Wanting to fit in, coupled with getting good grades and preparing for college can make teens feel like they are under a lot of pressure and cause some anxiety.

 

Things to Consider:

  • Have you noticed a significant change in their mood?
  • Does your child not want to participate in the things they enjoyed before?
  • Is your teen glued to the couch most of the time when they aren’t at school?
  • Does your child seem unmotivated or seem like they just don’t care?
  • Is your teen always worried about the worse case scenario?
 
 

How therapy can help your teen:

Therapy can provide a neutral place for them to learn about what is
happening in their brain during adolescence. 
 
Therapy can help teach teens healthier ways to cope with their fluctuating moods.

 

 

2.  A Change in Situation

 
As a parent, you may be trying to shield your child from as much pain and heartache as you can.
 
However, change is one constant we all experience.
 
Even positive changes can spark big emotions that may be difficult to navigate for teens.
 
Teens who have difficulty navigating these emotions may start to shut down and push you away or start lashing out.
 
Changes like divorce, death or a new school can trigger these emotions.
 

 

Things to Consider:

  • Has your teen started a new school?
  • Has there been a significant illness, death or divorce in the family?
  • Is there more conflict in the home than normal?
  • Is a parent or relative in jail, struggling with legal issues or addiction?
  • Has your teen been a victim of an assault or sexual assault?
  • Has a family member recently moved in with your family?
  • Has a pet recently died?
  • Is something significant happening in the family of your teen’s friend?

 

How therapy can help your teen:

 
Therapy can be helpful in giving you, the parent, strategies to help get through this transition at home. 
 
Therapy can provide your teen with a place to vent and process through these difficult emotions and provide them with coping skills to help navigate this transition more smoothly.
 

 

3.  Struggles with Friends or Bullying

 
Some conflict between friends is normal as they learn to navigate how to appropriately express their thoughts and feelings. 
 
With the addition of social media, fights and bullying can escalate quickly.  If your teen seems to be targeted, or struggles to stay out of conflict with their friends, this may be a sign that therapy is needed.
 
 

Things to Consider:

  • Did your adolescent recently tell you they are no longer friends with one of their best friends?
  • Are you often hearing about drama happening between your teen and their friends?
  • Is your teen expressing that they don’t want to go to school, but won’t tell you why?
  • Does your teen tend to be targeted by certain kids at school?
  • Has a rumor recently been started about your teen?
  • Has your teen recently broken up with their boyfriend or girlfriend?
 

How therapy can help your teen:

 

Therapy can provide a safe space to strategize and rehearse better ways to assert themselves, assert their boundaries and communicate their feelings more effectively.

Therapy can teach your teen about healthy conflict and how to navigate it without it having to ruin a friendship or cause harm.

 

4.  Difficulties with School

 
School can often be a main source of a teen’s stress and anxiety. 
 
Teens are getting more homework than they used to.  They are often encouraged to take honors, AP or college level classes and be involved in sports, clubs and extracurricular activities.
 
Some students find that the pressure to “do it all” becomes too much.
 
While other students find that they cannot keep up with the course load in high school, have difficulty with taking tests or feel like they are falling behind.
 
Some teens are really good at communicating how difficult school can be.  In other students, they may show less obvious signs, such as quitting a sports team or refusing to go to school.
 
 

Things to Consider:

  • Have you teen’s grades dropped?
  • Are they refusing to do their homework?
  • Are they refusing to go to school?
  • Does your teen stress out about every presentation or test they have to take?
  • Have they dropped out or want to drop out of a sports or extracurricular activity?
  • Are they preoccupied with applying for and getting into college?
  • Do they stress out if they get less than a A on their assignments or report cards?
  • Do you find that your teen is often crying about school related topics?

 

How therapy can help your teen:

 
Therapy can help teens manage their time better, study more efficiently, manage anxiety around test taking, grades and college and better cope with school stress.
 
If a learning disability or severe mental health disorder is suspected, a therapist can provide appropriate referrals for further testing and resources.
 
 

 

5.  Experimentation with Drugs & Alcohol

 
An adolescent’s brain chemistry pushes them to seek out adventure and excitement. 
 
You might hear them saying they are “so bored” often. 
 
In some teens, this thrill seeking behavior may mean that they will start experimenting with drugs and alcohol despite your disapproval. 
 
Drugs and alcohol can also be used as a way to cope with other difficult feelings and emotions. 
 
Peer pressure can also be a contributing factor.
 
 

Things to Consider:

  • Have you found evidence of drug or alcohol use?
  • Has your teen been caught drinking?
  • Is your teen often with friends unsupervised?
  • Has your teen started hanging out with a new group of friends?
  • Has your teen gotten in trouble with the law?
  • Does your once motivated teen now seem unmotivated?
 

How therapy can help your teen:

 
Therapy can help bridge the gap between your household rules and their need for new and exciting experiences. 
 
Therapy can help them to find ways to safely express their independence, autonomy and discuss the real hazards and long-term effects of substance use.
 
Therapy can help teens practice better ways to cope with difficult-to-manage feelings like anxiety, depression and grief.
 
 

 

6. Suicidal Thoughts & Self-Harm

 
With the increasing pressures from school, friendships, romantic relationships and social media have also come an increase in suicidal thoughts and self-harm. 
 
Teens who are unable to manage their emotions appropriately, or who may be bullied or overly stressed out, may resort to self-harm as a way to release the pain. 
 
This behavior should always be taken seriously.  Never downplay or assume that this is just an attempt to get attention. 
 
Teens who express suicidal thoughts, plan or intent to harm themselves should be evaluated by a healthcare professional or can be taken to the nearest emergency room.
 
 

Things to Consider:

  • Has your teen expressed to you that they feel suicidal?
  • Has your teen stated they want to be dead?
  • Is your teen preoccupied with death or dying?
  • Is your teen isolating themselves or giving away their belongings?
  • Have you noticed cuts or burns on your teen’s arms or legs?
  • Does your child often wear several bracelets covering large portions of their arms?
  • Does your child wear long sleeves when inappropriate weather wise?

 

How therapy can help your teen:

 
Therapy can provide your teen with less self-destructive coping skills, lessen or stop suicidal urges or self-harm behaviors, explore big emotions they might be struggling with, formulate a safety plan and provide them with resources to utilize if the urge to harm oneself arises.
 

 

7.  Lack of Self-Esteem or Self-Worth

 

Most teens will struggle with a lack of self-worth and self-esteem at some point during their adolescence. 

As their bodies and hormones are changing, it is common for teens to compare themselves to others or not like the way they look and feel about themselves. 

When this is done to extremes, teens will often have negative self-talk, changes in eating patterns, or feelings of anxiety, anger or sadness.

Adolescence is also a time when teens are forming their identity, their sexuality and their unique interests and abilities. These topics can be confusing and difficult for teens to manage alone.

 

Things to Consider:

  • Does your teen often discuss how they hate their body or want to lose weight?
  • Have you noticed your teen is often on a diet, is restricting their food intake or bingeing on food?
  • Is your child obsessed with exercising?
  • Does your teen often compare themselves to their friends?
  • Does your teen make statements like “I’m not good enough” or “I’m not pretty enough?”
  • Has your teen expressed that they don’t like themselves?
  • Has your teen recently expressed feelings surrounding their identity or sexuality?

 

How therapy can help your teen:

 
Therapy can re-teach your teen how to love themselves, boost their self-worth, identify negative self-talk and learn how to stop it, and quit comparing themselves to others.
 
Therapy can help your teen to feel proud of their unique abilities, strengths, and successes.
 
Therapy can help your teen to feel good in their body and formulate a positive relationship with food and exercise.
 
 

 

8.  Difficulty Communicating with Parents

 
Teens often feel that they know more than their parents do.  You will probably notice a shift in how much time they want to spend with you, how not “cool” you are and how correct (or not) your ideas are. 
 
You may notice extra sass, attitude and talking back as they navigate what is appropriate and what is not. 
 
There is often an increase in the amount of arguments parents have with their teens.
 
Teens like to push boundaries as a way to assert their independence and autonomy.  Teens thrive in environments where there are set rules and expectations that are consistent and predictable.  
 
 
 

Things to Consider:

Does it feel like you are always fighting with your teen?
Has your teen been disrespectful more often lately?
Does your teen often break household rules or curfew?
Do you have to ask your child repeatedly to do something before they actually do it?
 

 

How therapy can help your teen:

 
Therapy can help re-establish what the rules are in the household and discuss why rules are important. 
 
Therapy can provide a place for teens to work on communicating anger and frustration more appropriately and bridge the gap between parent and teen. 
 
Sessions can be conducted alone or as a family depending on needs.
 
 

Luckily, teens are now learning about their mental and emotional health in school.  This has lessened the stigma attached to getting help for mental health issues.  Teens can often identify when there is a problem before you can.  If your child is asking to attend therapy, consider this a positive step they are taking to reach out for help.

 

If you are interested in teen therapy for your child, or have any questions, contact me to learn more.

Megan Weber LPC provides online video therapy sessions and in person therapy sessions in Neenah, Appleton, Oshkosh and the surrounding Fox Cities area.

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