Do you often have people in your life tell you that you are too sensitive? That you need to toughen up or quit being so emotional? It’s possible that you are a Highly Sensitive Person.
Highly Sensitive People or HSPs are found in about 20% of the population. This is a trait you are born with, much like being introverted or extroverted. Researchers have found this particular trait not just in humans, but in over 100 other species.
It is thought that this sensitivity is a type of survival method, observe first, act second. The Highly Sensitive trait affects your nervous system, causing it to be much more reactive.
Often people who display these traits feel like there is something wrong with them because they don’t respond to the outside world like others around them do.
Don’t worry.
There is nothing wrong with you.
But, it’s helpful to understand better the inner workings of an HSP in order to thrive and flourish.
How do I know if I’m a Highly Sensitive Person?
1. You tend to feel things more deeply
Do your feelings ever seem to hit you like a ton of bricks? When you feel sad, you feel really sad. When you feel happy you feel really happy. Your emotions tend to be amplified.
Things that may not bother other people, really get under your skin. Feeling deeply doesn’t just stop at your emotions though. You can be deeply touched by a good book you’ve read or a movie you watched. This also means that you have a capacity to show empathy to others that others might not have.
2. Art and music deeply move you
Along with the last one, you tend to be drawn to the arts. Where a painting may just be paint on a canvas for others, you have a strong reaction and are touched by its beauty.
Same goes with music. Music tends to move you in a way that others cannot understand. These songs become your anthems, your battle cries. You can relate to the lyrics and know exactly what the artist meant by the words, ultimately feeling their emotions.
3. You often suffer from sensory overload
You may find that you are very sensitive to bright lights, loud noises, strong smells, textures or fabrics. This is a direct result of an overactive nervous system. Your system tends to be hyper-reactive to an over abundance of stimuli.
Where other people’s bodies may block out many of these sensory signals as unimportant, someone who is highly sensitive can be overwhelmed with them. Highly Sensitive People also tend to have more allergies, food intolerances and negative reactions to pharmaceuticals, including being sensitive to caffeine.
4. Other people’s moods affect you
This is a biggie for HSPs. Have you ever had that feeling when you walk into a room where everyone is upset or angry and almost instantly your mood changes and you begin to feel upset for no reason?
Highly Sensitive People sense the emotions of those around them. Not only are you quick to notice how they feel, but you unintentionally take on their emotions. This can feel very overwhelming and bring down your energy.
Some HSPs will even report that they feel other people’s pain physically. For example, if your friend broke her leg, you may actually feel pain in your leg.
5. You need to withdraw to recharge
As a Highly Sensitive Person, you are taking in a lot of information and stimuli. We already talked about how you can be overwhelmed by lights, sounds and the emotions of others.
This constant influx of information to your system makes many HSPs feel very overwhelmed and exhausted after spending time with others.
Retreating back to your home to recharge is not only needed, but necessary. Often HSPs need their alone time in order to be at their best. Make this alone time a priority to avoid burnout.
6. You tend to avoid situations that will be upsetting or overwhelming
Because you tend to feel others emotions deeply, and know that it can upset you, you tend to avoid situations that you know are going to be extra taxing on you emotionally.
This includes confrontation and situations where you might be overwhelmed by your senses, such as scary movies, violent TV shows or the nightly news.
7. You are extremely detail oriented
HSPs are receiving so much information from their surroundings, they will often pick up on details that others might not notice. HSPs will be the people who notice a new hair cut, shoes or non-verbal cues from those around them. This makes them great assets in careers that rely on details.
8. Criticism can be viewed as harsh
Because Highly Sensitive People feel things so deeply and empathy comes natural to them, they have a difficult time with any form of criticism, even if it’s constructive. They tend to take things more personally. This can lead them to behaviors where they will avoid criticism, such as people pleasing or hazy boundaries.
9. You are very conscientious
HSPs feel things deeply and that includes other people’s emotions. They are more likely to walk in other’s shoes and show a great deal of empathy. They want to make people feel comfortable and ease other’s pain. They tend to have great manners and are keen on hospitality. They also make great people to confide in when feeling upset.
10. You cry more easily
Being moved emotionally by the overabundance of stimuli coming their way can cause them to cry much easier and more often. HSPs may have been made fun of as kids or adults for being “cry babies” or crying during movies and commercials.
11. You may be more prone to feelings of anxiety and depression
The overwhelming amount of stimulus that is coming at you at all times can make it harder to cope with what is going on around you. HSPs need to prioritize self care in order to keep their mental health in check. Seeking out friends, mentors or therapists is a good idea to help process your feelings and lighten the load.
How many of the above statements did you say “Yes” to?
You don’t need to have all of these traits to be considered a Highly Sensitive Person, but the more you have, the greater your chances.
Being Highly Sensitive does not have to hold you back. Understanding the way you’re wired can help you to use these traits to your advantage.
If you need help navigating as a Highly Sensitive Person, contact me to learn more.
Currently serving Neenah, Appleton, Oshkosh and the surrounding Fox Cities area.
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